Friday, January 22, 2010

Bartcop Hits a Home Run!

 Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you Bartcop:


Subject: Subject: that DanD anti-Israeli e-mailer

Hey Bart old buddy,
They wanted you to rebuke DanD.
Give anyone with the time and inclination to do so, a slot for an opposing viewpoint.
Right there - on a linked page - in good old Bartcop.
Go Ahead I dare you,,,,,,lol
 Hoosier Tim
P.S. It could get interesting
 
Since the Middle Eastern quicksand is something into which I refuse to step,
I can't imagine why I would submit to your suggestion.
....but check this out:
 
Subject: just one more thing
We have to stop meeting this way.
Whaaaa...?
No disrespect, but I wonder if you’ve visited Israel or spoken to many Israelis?
Negative.
My expertise in this field is a lack of religious insanity.
I hold a Doctorate in the field of lack of religious insanity.
Stating that Israelis don’t want peace is like saying all Americans supported the
horrible, horrible war in Iraq.  As you can testify, we didn’t.
I disagree.
If, say, 60% of Israel was tired of suicide bombs, why don't they vote to move to America?
We have room, and it would be way cheaper in treasure and blood
to move them here than to try to protect them way the fuck over there.
We give Israel what?  Wild guess $20B a year.  (How'd I do?)
Why not instead spend $100B on a five year project to move them to OK and AZ and NM?
They still got their precious desert but they're no longer surrounded by 20M Arabs who want them dead.
But for the religiously insane, that's a lose-lose.
Dying is what both sides live for.
Sand is fucking sand.
Graduate beyond the non-existent Invisible Cloud Being bullshit and the logic is clear.
You either want to watch your kids grow up and have their own kids,
or you want the non-existent Invisible Cloud Being to be happy.
Christ, what year us this, 600 AD?
You can not serve two masters.
Between your kid's lives and illogical religious supersition, it would be way cool
if I could depend on my fellow science-based non-Neo-Cons to chose f-ing life.
And if you can't find a way to chose your kids over crazy-ass superstituion,
then I'll just say, as I have for many years, I'm glad you're not my parents.
You'd have to be religiously insane to INSIST on living in a desert
surrounded by 20M suicide bombers who want you f-ing dead at any cost.
Sidebar:
I guess "suicide bomber" and "at any cost" are redundant.
Israel is a melting pot for Jewish people from all over the world, and most Israeli citizens are actually
secular and do not practice Judaism.  Most of them simply want refuge; to live someplace where they
sincerely hope they won’t be made into lampshades.  Their country is teeny, tiny, and surrounded by
hostile neighbors and the sea.  It’s hot as hell, and talk about cabin fever.  Not much room to go anywhere,
and people in the region like Mahmoud Ahmadinejad tend to cause them alarm.  Go figure..
My point exactly.
Why should we spend billions of dollars in taxes and thousands of military lives to prevent your
religiously-insane neighbors from invading your religiously-insane country?  What's the point?
If it wasn't for that darned religious insanity, Israelis would agree to re-locate, right?
You think a Haitian would have any problem re-locating right now?
If you don't like where you are, but you INSIST on staying there,
don't come to me when your stupidity endangers your people.
A death-free option in moving to the US in clearly presented to the Israeli government,
but they said, "No, we PREFER God's Holy Sand to watching our children outlive us."
I don't get it.
Personally, the whole mystical sacred geographical thingie is beyond me, and it’s ironic that
“the holy land” for three different religions is a place that may never see peace.
You suggest that a desert someplace else might work out better for everybody, but after the
Holocaust things were hectic, and at this particular point in time I am really thinking that a new
desert is not exactly a viable option.  I could be wrong.  Perhaps the Outback is available.
ha ha
Dude - it sounds like we might agree!
Wait...
Chris, we could give the Israelis f-ing Detroit!
ha ha
Seriously, we have two major cities who could use an serious influx of Jewish money!
If you have a nice fur coat, the land values in Detroit are unbeatable!
If you miss that whole "by the sea" thing, New Orleans needs Jewish doctors and lawyers!
Hell, if they had any experience in border control, we could give Israel southern Arizona and....

Damn, when I hit the home run, can they even find the ball in the bay?
Let's move Israel to the AZ-CA border.
Ladies and gentleman, I give you New Israel!!!

But no, that would make sense so we can't do that.
We'd have better security, we'd save money, we'd save lives,
but you know what the very best part of this plan would be?
And I don't mean to paint with too big a brush, 
but if they lose Israel as an excuse - could things change?
If the Infidel pig-footers are "chased away" doesn't that mean the Arabs won?
Beside, they have nukes.
They can guard my border anyday.
Plus, if they expand in to New Mexico they could defend us from a Texas pre-emptive strike!
Obviously, it’s a heated, historically and politically complicated issue with many facets.
If you want to steer clear of it; fine.  If you want to raise a storm, print emails like Dan D’’s.
Just sayin…..
 BamLit
 
I printed DanD's e-mail so people could argue directly with him :)
Since nobody in history has ever changed their minds about the subject,
why do people even want to discuss it?
 
  Send e-mail to Bart  |  Discuss it on The BartCop ForumComment on it at the BartBlog!

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